Phyllis Reardon M.Ed
Life Coach
Well my first grandchild, baby granddaughter, is a week old and she is beautiful!
Over the past several months I wondered what name I would be called by my future grandchild.
I had to decide what name I wanted to go by...was I ready for that "Grand" prefix?? I wasn't sure. My thoughts went from will that age me? to by now in our society surely someone has created a better name than Grandma or Nanny. There must be another label that will be unique to me.
I thought of Nanny Phyllis, Nanny P. Nanna, Nanna P, but just couldn't decide. It was like going into a store and all the items on a rack looked alike. I wanted something different!
I did my market research, so to speak. I discussed with friends who were already grandparents and asked how they decided on a name. Some had put a lot of thought into the name, while others defaulted to Nanny or Grandma/pa depending on the other set of grandparents. No default for me, I wanted to create my own title.
I Googled, for sure I'd find what I was looking for there...to no avail, the same names were recycled. I even checked other cultures to see what they were using and for the most part they were all some form of Nanny. What to do? First major dilemma as a Grandparent!
Surprise, Surprise
I was very fortunate to be able to spend 5 days this week with new baby girl and surprise, surprise; as I took her from her Mom's arms the words just flowed from my mouth, " Come to Grandma." I said it and it felt natural and real. So I am now Grandma, forever and a day and loving it.
What's in a Grandparents name?
It has to feel right for you. What have you choosen to be called? Love to hear your thoughts.
Phyllis Reardon
Life Coach......Grandma:)
phyllis@coachphyllis.com
www.coachphyllis.com
Monday, October 10, 2011
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Parent to Grandparent Same or Different?
Phyllis Reardon M.Ed
Life Coach
Note
As of 2 days ago I am now a Grandmother, my granddaughter was born on Sept 29th. so I thought I would dust off this article and reprint. For grandparents on my subscriber list I have started a GrandParents' Club Blog, do check out at www.grandparentsclub.blogpot.com. Grandparent thoughts and article s are welcome, just email me phyllis@coachphyllis.com.
We are coming to a time when most of the baby boomers in our nation are becoming grandparents and therefore we will have the largest population of grandparents in the history of North America. Grand parenting is not distinct onto itself as it brings with it other labels and relationships, like mother-in-law, father-in-law. How come there are more jokes about mother-in-laws than father-in-laws? That’s another article.
Just how do you grand parent? What’s expected? How do you behave? Keep in mind that this ‘new’ child isn’t your child and that he /she will be the product of your beliefs, values and traditions plus the beliefs, values and traditions of another family, possibly another culture. I would like to offer you some of my life coaching activities that I use with my clients to help them transition from parent to grandparent, Try them and share with friends, they certainly make for a good starting points for grand parent discussions.
1. Let your son/daughter, son/daughter in-law know that they have your support but only when Needed and/ or Requested. This will let them know that you love them and care for them but that you will keep an appropriate distance. Depending on individual family relations this will be expressed in various forms.
2. Resist saying, “when little Johnny/Susie was a baby” I did this or that or the other thing. This puts the focus on you, remember always put the new parents and grandchild first in your phone calls, emails or direct conversations. Use soft questions to begin conversations. How is baby today? How is Mommy/Daddy today? These are caring questions that put a positive focus on the new family.
3. Gift giving can always be a concern as you need to be in tune with the parent’s values and needs. To be practical find out what is needed. One safe gift to give as a birth gift is opening a bank account in the child’s name. This helps instill in the child at an early age the value of saving money which is for the most part valued in our society. Make sure it is at Mom and Dad’s bank for convenience.
4. If living at a distance and are technical savvy, ask the parents if you could view baby at least once a month via some form of a webcam. This will allow you to see your grandchild’s growth and he/she will get to associate your name with your smiling face.
Enjoy your grandchild and they will see you as a source of joy and wisdom that will help shape their life.
Life Coach
Note
As of 2 days ago I am now a Grandmother, my granddaughter was born on Sept 29th. so I thought I would dust off this article and reprint. For grandparents on my subscriber list I have started a GrandParents' Club Blog, do check out at www.grandparentsclub.blogpot.com. Grandparent thoughts and article s are welcome, just email me phyllis@coachphyllis.com.
Parent to Grandparent Same or Different?
Oh different!
We are coming to a time when most of the baby boomers in our nation are becoming grandparents and therefore we will have the largest population of grandparents in the history of North America. Grand parenting is not distinct onto itself as it brings with it other labels and relationships, like mother-in-law, father-in-law. How come there are more jokes about mother-in-laws than father-in-laws? That’s another article.
Just how do you grand parent? What’s expected? How do you behave? Keep in mind that this ‘new’ child isn’t your child and that he /she will be the product of your beliefs, values and traditions plus the beliefs, values and traditions of another family, possibly another culture. I would like to offer you some of my life coaching activities that I use with my clients to help them transition from parent to grandparent, Try them and share with friends, they certainly make for a good starting points for grand parent discussions.
2. Resist saying, “when little Johnny/Susie was a baby” I did this or that or the other thing. This puts the focus on you, remember always put the new parents and grandchild first in your phone calls, emails or direct conversations. Use soft questions to begin conversations. How is baby today? How is Mommy/Daddy today? These are caring questions that put a positive focus on the new family.
3. Gift giving can always be a concern as you need to be in tune with the parent’s values and needs. To be practical find out what is needed. One safe gift to give as a birth gift is opening a bank account in the child’s name. This helps instill in the child at an early age the value of saving money which is for the most part valued in our society. Make sure it is at Mom and Dad’s bank for convenience.
4. If living at a distance and are technical savvy, ask the parents if you could view baby at least once a month via some form of a webcam. This will allow you to see your grandchild’s growth and he/she will get to associate your name with your smiling face.
5. Create a grandparent journal. Just purchase a low cost blank booklet and make notes of your thoughts and happenings for your grandchild’s first year. A sample might be ’the day you were born the temperature was. ’ The minute I heard you were born, note your feelings. Continue this for a year, Keep the journal and present to your grandchild at a moment in their life that you decide, possibly 18 birthday, high school graduation etc.
If you would like more information please contact me phyllis@coachphyllis.com
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