Life Coach
Note
As of 2 days ago I am now a Grandmother, my granddaughter was born on Sept 29th. so I thought I would dust off this article and reprint. For grandparents on my subscriber list I have started a GrandParents' Club Blog, do check out at www.grandparentsclub.blogpot.com. Grandparent thoughts and article s are welcome, just email me phyllis@coachphyllis.com.
Parent to Grandparent Same or Different?
Oh different!
We are coming to a time when most of the baby boomers in our nation are becoming grandparents and therefore we will have the largest population of grandparents in the history of North America. Grand parenting is not distinct onto itself as it brings with it other labels and relationships, like mother-in-law, father-in-law. How come there are more jokes about mother-in-laws than father-in-laws? That’s another article.
Just how do you grand parent? What’s expected? How do you behave? Keep in mind that this ‘new’ child isn’t your child and that he /she will be the product of your beliefs, values and traditions plus the beliefs, values and traditions of another family, possibly another culture. I would like to offer you some of my life coaching activities that I use with my clients to help them transition from parent to grandparent, Try them and share with friends, they certainly make for a good starting points for grand parent discussions.
2. Resist saying, “when little Johnny/Susie was a baby” I did this or that or the other thing. This puts the focus on you, remember always put the new parents and grandchild first in your phone calls, emails or direct conversations. Use soft questions to begin conversations. How is baby today? How is Mommy/Daddy today? These are caring questions that put a positive focus on the new family.
3. Gift giving can always be a concern as you need to be in tune with the parent’s values and needs. To be practical find out what is needed. One safe gift to give as a birth gift is opening a bank account in the child’s name. This helps instill in the child at an early age the value of saving money which is for the most part valued in our society. Make sure it is at Mom and Dad’s bank for convenience.
4. If living at a distance and are technical savvy, ask the parents if you could view baby at least once a month via some form of a webcam. This will allow you to see your grandchild’s growth and he/she will get to associate your name with your smiling face.
5. Create a grandparent journal. Just purchase a low cost blank booklet and make notes of your thoughts and happenings for your grandchild’s first year. A sample might be ’the day you were born the temperature was. ’ The minute I heard you were born, note your feelings. Continue this for a year, Keep the journal and present to your grandchild at a moment in their life that you decide, possibly 18 birthday, high school graduation etc.
If you would like more information please contact me phyllis@coachphyllis.com
These are great suggestions! I especially wish that I had opened a bank account for my grandchildren when they were born. If I had deposited just $100 when they were born, and another $100 for each birthday and Christmas, they would have from $1500 to $4000 in their accounts by now, not counting interest. I advise all new grandparents to do something similar. Buy a token gift, but put the bulk of your gifts into a bank account.
ReplyDelete